Blogging For Kicks

I wasn’t going to do this any more, I really wasn’t, but I love to talk, even with my fingers, so here I am again.

I post on a forum that comments on politics, etc, and I never fail to find some comment that just makes me scratch my head. I know, a lot of people who read my thoughts do the same thing, I’m sure, but since this is my blog, it’s my thoughts that are going to get written here. Anyway, the latest head-scratcher for me was a comment on how the Democrats are holding up the vote on Bolton as U.N. Ambassador simply to be mean to Bush. Now, I can see how they might want to believe that, but the fact is, if they are paying attention to what’s going on at all they would know that’s simply not the case. The Democrats have what they consider to be good reasons for concern and for waiting for more information about those concerns.

I guess there are several areas they are concerned about, not the least of which is his supposed inability to associate with his own staff and co-workers in any kind of diplomatic way. I mean, if he can’t be decent and get along with them, how is he to be expected to act with decorum towards representatives of governments we are already at odds with? My grandma always told me you can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar, and while at the time I wondered why on earth anyone would want to catch flies, I do understand it now. I think it applies quite well to diplomatic ventures, because if you keep alienating those you’re trying to reach some accord with you’re simply never going to get it done, and you are probably going to make things worse. We really need someone who can get the point across without smacking them in the face with it, then sneering at their less-than-diplomatic response in return. That’s not the way to win friends and influence people.

Now, while these tendencies he apparently has are disturbing, there is another area that seems to be even worse. Apparently he has asked for redacted copies of National Security Agency telephone intercepts that involve Government officials and then asked to know who those officials are. We all know that phone conversations are pretty much open to anyone who wants to hear them and who have the right equipment, so that’s not surprising. Neither is the fact that the names of those Government officials whose calls may have been intercepted have always been redacted from the written reports. People have always respected that since there are all kinds of inappropriate actions that could be taken against these people if their names were known, depending on what was said during the calls. However, Bolton seems to have made a habit of requesting the names, against all protocols, and then, the accusations go, he uses that information for his own purposes.

Is this true? We don’t know. What we do know is that the White House has files containing all the copies he’s requested, and all the names he’s asked to have revealed to him. All they have to do is hand those files over to the committee, let them see what’s true or false, and then a vote can be taken on him. However, the WH refuses to release them. One has to wonder why. What’s in those files that W doesn’t want the Senators to see? It seems to me that anytime there are refusals to make things like that public it usually means there’s something in there that will go against whomever is witholding them.

Now Senator Lott, not a Democrat by anyone’s reckoning, has said the WH should just hand the files over and let them see what’s there. He understands what the hangup is and says if the members of the committee are allowed to go over those files, a vote will be done, up or down. I don’t know about you, but when a member of the opposition as high up and powerful as Mr. Lott is gets on the bandwagon, it tells me that the Democrats are doing just the right thing by refusing to vote without knowing whether the charges made against the man are true or false. Obstruction? Not hardly, unless you are aiming the charge at the White House.

Well, I’ve given it a shot and nothing has come of it, so I guess this is the last visit to my blog. I really hoped it would get some reaction somewhere, but it hasn’t, so I give up. I don’t have fun just writing to myself every day and it’s just not worth the time and trouble to mess with it if no one ever sees it. Oh, well, at least I tried it.

Well, the worst has happened and a verifiable sexual predator has been turned loose on the streets of the world with what amounts to permission to keep doing what he’s been doing. I can’t believe these people actually couldn’t see him for the pervert he is, but it’s been done and we all have to live with it now. And don’t for a minute think he won’t go right back to doing what he’s always done, here or in Europe, or wherever he moves his family to. Once a molester, always a molester, unless they get treatment, and even then it’s not certain they won’t be back at it sooner or later. Here is a man with the money and prestige to do anything he wants to do, and anyone who calls him on it is painted as a liar, a money-grubber, or someone who has a vendetta against him for some reason. Never a hint of remorse, oh no. Not for this animal who can pay off anyone at any time, and has made a habit of doing so.

Ask yourself about the witnesses who testified for him. Who were they? People who have a vested interest in keeping him out of prison so their money-train can keep on chugging along, and his ex-wife who won’t do anything to risk her ability to see and be with her children. No, there’s not a one I would trust for any reason. And what about all the damaging testimony supposedly coming from Jay Leno, Chris Tucker, and others? They all said the kid never asked for money, totally against what the Defense claimed they would say, yet their word was taken as truth. The jury said they considered Jose Salas’ testimony to be totally truthful, yet they totally disregarded the part about him and the kid being drunk four out of five days. One has to ask why. What about all those who testified about having seen and experienced things of a sexual nature against boys? Were they all lying, and if so, why? What did they have to gain? Nothing. Yet, their tesimony was totally ignored. I really don’t get it. What is it with these famous guys?

OJ had mountains of evidence against him, and more that his Defense managed to have barred, but he was set free. Now, at least he probably won’t be going around killing women all the time, but still, he should have paid for what he did. Robert Blake - did her or did he not kill his wife? I don’t know about his story, since there seem to be two credible sides to what happened. His story about leaving his gun on the table of the restaurant does sound strange, yet when a policeman who’s been on the job for years talks about how distraught he was, how he kept throwing up and all, how can you not feel this is a man who just walked up on a scene he had never experienced before and was having an awful lot of trouble handling? That one confuses me, but he did get off, whether rightly or not. I would have no problem with a guilty verdict for soliciting a murder, or accessory to a murder, since I think that was proven, but I’m just unsure about him being the actual murderer.

And now Michael Jackson. As I said in my original posting, if anyone else had all the boy traps Jackson has at their house there would be no doubt of what they were there for. Ok, so the amusement park could be just for having fun, and if all he did was have kids over for fun at times, there would be no problem, but no grown man has sleepovers for boys of a certain age, actually sleeping in the bed with them, for innocent reasons. I’ve lived a lot of years and known more people than I can even remember now, and not once in all those years have any of those people done anything like that. Oh, there was one old man who lived near my grandparents who took a shine to my brother when we were little and invited him over to his barn one day to choose a toy from his “stash”. I tagged along, much to his displeasure, and when we got there he had a huge chest full of toys of all kinds and told Jack to help himself. He wasn’t quite as giving with me, handing me a bow and arrow set when Jack asked if I could have something, too, and while we didn’t think much of it at the time, I look back on that and wonder what might have happened to my brother if I hadn’t tagged along with them. He is the only man I have ever seen who had what I would describe as a “boy trap”. Now, he didn’t have the money Mr. Jackson does, and he certainly wasn’t as beloved as Michael is all over the world, but he did have his trap, ready and waiting, and I see no difference between the two men whatsoever. They are examples of perverts who have all the trappings to make any little boy happy and more willing to “pay for” their largesse any way they want them to.

You would think more young boys would talk about it, wouldn’t you. At least until you see what’s been done to the boys who’ve dared to speak up against Michael. It’s kind of like what women who’ve been raped go through, or at least they used to, by being called everything but a decent woman, with witnesses paid to line up and claim they’ve “had her before, willingly” all around the block. And of course, as we all know, if a woman says yes to one guy, she must say yes to them all, right?

I feel sorry for this boy, and the others, and any of the ones who will follow, because now MJ has the law on his side, and when he tells the world what whores these boys and their families are, people are more likely to believe him. After all, he was found innocent this time, wasn’t he?

Well, another day, another thought or two. For what it’s worth, here goes.

I wonder what the jury in the MJ trial is doing? Are they just taking their time over all the evidence, or are the hopelessly deadlocked? We are now in the sixth day of deliberations, and while a longer time usually bodes well for the Prosecution, after a while it becomes bad for everyone, since it signals there might be a problem coming to a unanimous decision. I wish our state were like some others, where a majority could be enough. Here, if even one person refuses to vote like the other eleven, the whole trial is out the door, and it becomes a matter of either letting it drop or having a whole other trial. I don’t know what they would do in this case if that happened. As I have noted before, I don’t see how anyone couldn’t see he is guilty, so I’m hoping they are just taking their time to make sure it’s done right. I mean, really, if it were the little old guy down the street who had no kids of his own yet had a whole yard and house full of Kiddie Traps and made a habit of getting the boys to come to sleepovers where they were in the same bed, would anyone even blink an eye before saying this man is guilty as all get out, lock him up and throw away the key? Not on your life. That old guy would be gone before the ink dried on the jury form. It proabably wouldn’t take over two or three hours, tops, to convict him, and that would only be to make it look good. Ah, the privilege of money and fame, right? You can even molest little boys, over and over again, with no repercussions. Sick, isn’t it?

Well, it looks like the killing is still going on in Iraq. After all this time it seems we still have to look forward to all the names of the dead young men and women that are being sacrificed for one man’s ego and the pocketbooks of his buddies. I still wonder why his own two daughters, both of the age to serve, aren’t over there. I mean, if it’s so important that our sons and daughters have to go, why isn’t it important enough for his kids, too? I have to say I have had enough. Acutally, I had enough before we ever went into that country. And what about Bin Laden, the bastard that invaded and attacked us, killing so many innocent people in one fell swoop, then danced and cheered at the news? Where is he now? Why aren’t all our forces being used to track down this sick excuse of a human being and hang him by the testicles until he cries like a baby and praises Jehovah and his son Jesus as the one and only God of all? Yet, there he is, still living, still plotting, still aiming to do us more harm, while we went in to Iraq and chased a paper tiger down a hole. And doesn’t it irk you to know that those Weapons of Mass Destruction turned out to be the deadly farts of a lice-infested old gopher like Saddam? Oh, yeah, it was worth it, all right. Whoopee. And in case you couldn’t tell, that was sarcasm.

I guess either I don’t write anything anyone is interested in, or there is something else needed to get people to realize my blog exists, but either way, I’ve had no one reply to anything I’ve written. Par for the course, I’d say. Anyway, since it’s been a while since I’ve used or even owned a diary, I guess this will make a good substitute. They say writing down what you feel and think is good for you, so here goes.

Dear Diary:

Today was just one more day in a long line of boring, do-nothing days. Wake early, test my blood sugar, eat breakfast, then watch the morning news shows. Next comes lunch, then the not-so-interesting-but-time-filling shows until my soaps come on, and after they are over, I hop on the computer to write the daily Passions recap for Tvmegasite.com and then more not-so-interesting shows until dinner. After dinner, the really boring shows come on, and now that it’s rerun time, it’s not much better during “prime time”. I did break it up a little with a trip to the grocery store, and the new kitten keeps me busy at times wanting attention and petting, but other than that, it’s the same old thing. Hey, tomorrow I go to the doctor again! Yippee. More poking and prodding. I wonder what they will find wrong with me this time?

I really wish I could still go for long walks. The weather is very nice right now, cool for June, and after all the rain we’ve had over the winter there are flowers and weeds blooming all over the place. Oh, I can go for a ride in the car and see them from afar, but oh, to be able to walk through them and actually see each one! I keep hoping that if I lose some weight I might be able to walk without pain, but so far, no such luck. The more I walk, the worse I hurt, so I’ve just given up. I am continuing the weightloss diet, however, but as hard as I try, I can’t seem to lose anything. I have considered gastric bypass surgery, but with my luck, I’d carve my insides up and still not lose an ounce. LOL!! You want to know just how hard it is for me to lose? I went for two weeks eating less than 1,000 calories a day, and lost…..ZERO!! I am supposed to be eating 2,000 calories per day but a mess up in the dietician’s orders left me starving to the point I could barely make it to the bathroom. 2 ounces of very lean meat equals 70 calories, while each serving is supposed to equal 150 calories, so you can see where I was messing up. And my blood sugar got worse and worse, mainly because while I was getting enough carbs each day, I was far below what I should have to counteract the carbs in protein. Once I adjusted that, I started feeling better and my blood sugar leveled out, but still, no weight loss. I’m stumped, and getting more depressed by the day.

My kids are grown and have their own lives, although the three youngest still bunk with me. They all work and make pretty good money, yet it’s like pulling teeth to get 30 to 50 dollars each month from any of them. I don’t really want to be here by myself since I live in a not-so-nice area in an alley, with no close neighbors and no street lights, but I really think I need to tell them they will either help me with the expenses here or move out. I don’t think $100 a month for room and board is too much to ask, do you? That would help me out a lot. I have SS and SSI of a little over $800 per month, with rent of $500 and all utilities paid by me, and I just can’t do that. They use electricity, gas, water, and my telephone, so they should help pay for it, don’t you think?

As I said before, the weather here has been absolutely wonderful for the last few weeks. We are in the 70’s now, not what you would expect for June, when we usually are in the high 90’s to 106 or even higher. I know this isn’t going to last, and we will probably end up having those 100 + degree days in November and December, but I really am loving it now. The hills are green, the flowers are blooming everywhere, and there seems to be a constant breeze blowing, morning to night. What an idyllic arrangement! Who could ask for more?

Ok, that’s enough of my bellyaching for now. Thanks for listening, diary. It really does help to put my feelings down on a page, even if it’s in a blog, not a booklet.

A person can’t go through the day without hearing about Michael Jackson and his trial for being a pedophile, among other things. It’s everywhere, and by now I would imagine that everyone has decided which side they fall on. Some think he is totally innocent, the victim in a plot to get money from him, just a poor, put-upon soul trying to do good things and spread love all over the world. Others see him as nothing more than your everyday, child molesting pedophile, albeit one with tons of money and a whole amusement park at his ranch to bring in an everlasting supply of new prospects for his bedroom. I dare say each side has it’s merits.

Here is a guy who seems to love kids, and who seems to delight in helping the sick and dying. He opens his home and his heart to the kids and their families, over and over again, and, they say, only the best heart could be that giving. It sounds good, and even reasonable, until you get to the part where the boys sleep in his fortress bedroom, guarded by locks, buzzers, alarms, etc, to give them early warning when someone is heading their way. Plus, this is not a teenager, not even a guy in his 20’s who “never had a childhood” and still wants to be one of the boys. This is a man in his 40’s, way past the time when most children with deprived childhoods finally grow up and live in the real world. As you can see, every silver lining in this story comes with it’s own dark cloud.

I have to say I am of the belief that this man is a pedophile, pure and simple, and here’s why. Every man who wants to lure kids into his way of life uses some kind of lure. Maybe it’s cookies, or candy, or a free soda at his diner or drive-in every afternoon. Maybe he gives his time coaching Little League, always gentle and nurturing of every kid and willing to spend extra time tutoring those who can’t quite get the hang of it. Maybe he takes them on camping trips as a Scout leader, or a church deacon, or whatever. The main thing is, they always have ways of drawing kids to them and making them want to please them somehow, or at the very least, they have some power over the kids and so they don’t want to defy him. There’s always a catch. So, let’s look at Michael. He has, as already mentioned, a whole amusement park on his ranch and brings kids there all the time to play and have as much fun as they want to. Every so often he finds a special kid who he treats to overnight stays at his house, in his room, in his very bed. He brings their families, too, so it seems on the up-and-up, but they stay in separate quarters, not in the main house, near his room. That’s on it’s own separate floor, if I heard right, and as I mentioned before, it’s equipped with alarms that let him know whenever anyone comes up the stairs and walks into the hallway leading to that room. This room is full of toys, costumes, pajamas…you name it. Now, tell me something. Just what 40-some year old man do you know who does that? I can’t think of one. No, this is a pedophile paradise, designed to lure his victims into his web and keep them there, as well as keep their mouths quiet or risk losing their special privileges. He talks about being used for his money? Well, of course he is. He sets it up that way. Kids want to keep having fun, they want to be able to say Michael Jackson is their special friend, and they want to keep being treated to the shopping trips and other perks they get as long as he wants to keep them around. They are trained by him to see him as their “sugar daddy”, the one who gives them everything, so why wouldn’t they continue to see him as such once the thrill is gone and they are out on their ears?

I will finish by using an expression my Grandmother first taught me, although I have heard it used many times by others since then. That is just that if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it must be a duck. Michael Jackson walks, talks, and acts like a pedophile. You can take it from there. Now, having said this, do I think he will be found guilty by this jury? I don’t have a clue. I do know that even his backers, at least the ones whose words can be trusted, can bring themselves to say he’s absolutely innocent. Take Jesse Jackson on the news last night. His words were that if the jury can find reasonable doubt, Jackson won’t be convicted. Reasonable doubt. That’s what the attorneys of guilty people work for to get their clients off, not what an innocent man seeks. No, Jesse Jackson proclaimed loudly and clearly the guilt of this supposed “man-boy” in words no one should be able to misunderstand. Reasonable doubt = guilty, and Michael Jackson = pedophile, plain and simple.

Life begins and ends, a constant race
run to the singular drumbeat heard only
by the runner. I note the different
rythymns of each person on the track
with me, wondering what they hear,
knowing only that I must keep time 
to the syncapation that is mine. 
Trying to match the steps of others
brings confusion, hearing my drum, 
running to theirs. Returning to my beat, 
the race becomes mine again. I run on
knowing the end is somewhere ahead
waiting for the sound of my steps.
Then my drum will grow silent.
My destination will be known.
I will leave no more footprints
My singular beat will be no more.

I look around today and wonder at the world my grandkids are going to grow up in. There have been a lot of good things that have happened since I was their age: we can travel anywhere in the world in a day or less, we have had many improvements in everything from cleaning supplies to cars to airplanes, and many diseases that spelled sure death when I was a kid are curable now. There are so many more good things that make life today much better and safer for the kids and the parents, but at times I think all the good is outweighed by all the bad that’s come about at the same time. I remember leaving my house as soon as breakfast was done and only coming home for lunch, unless my friend’s mom fed me, then going back out and staying until there was just enough light left to see before heading back home for dinner, bath, and bed. We walked or rode our bikes all over town and even out into the countryside, and we always made it back safely. We ate whatever our neighbors offered us without worrying about poison or foreign objects or disease. Everyone in the neighborhood knew us by name, and we knew them all, too, only calling Mr. and Mrs., or sometimes Aunt and Uncle. Our families knew each other and everyone else too, and when we went shopping, the clerks knew us by name. We didn’t worry about locking the doors, even if we were gone all day, and we never lost a thing to burglars. Life was just so much more civil and safe back then. Now, I can’t let one of my grandkids out into the front yard without either sitting out there with them or checking on them every few minutes, depending on their age, and never mind letting them go visit some other kid down the street. They don’t get sent to the store alone, they don’t walk to school alone, and they never, never, never talk to the neighbors since we have no idea who they are most of the time. My kids and grandkids played Nintendo or some other games all day long, only going outside every once in a while, just the opposite of what kids of my time did. No wonder there is an epidemic of overweight kids nowadays. I think I may have seen three kids in the years I was growing up who were chubby, and they were the ones whose parents didn’t let them play with the rest of us.

It breaks my heart to know my kids never really knew the fun I and my friends did, and now my grandkids will never have a clue. It just keeps getting worse and worse, and I don’t see how it will ever get better. All I can say is for all the advances we have made over the years in technology don’t make up for what we’ve lost on the human side. Are there really more perverts out there? Did they just hide better back when I was a kid? I don’t have the answers, but it’s really a sad thing, and it’s not restricted to the strange-looking stranger in the neighborhood now, it’s in the churches, on the playgrounds, in the parks, even right next door. When, exactly, did this plague of vileness hit the earth, and where did it come from?

This is my first attempt at blogging, so forgive my ignorance if it isn’t done correctly. Please come on in and share your thoughts with us.